Grammy Rundown

For anyone who didn't watch the 53rd Grammy Awards this year, here's a quick recap of the show with commentary by yours truly:

Yolanda Adams, Jennifer Hudson, Martina McBride, Christina Aguilera, and Florence Welch of Florence & the Machine kicked things off with a tribute to Aretha Franklin, who was present via video in drastically slimmed-down post-surgery shape. Christina sang her heart out, no doubt to make up for her Super Bowl lyric-forgetting fiasco, and managed to distract me from the fact that Florence Welch always looks like a transvestite for the majority of the performance.

Lady Gaga underwhelmed with the premiere of her latest song "Born This Way", which she would later gush that she imagined Whitney Houston singing it while writing because it was too good for her. False body modifications just don't cut it for over-the-top after the public spectacle she has been for the past couple years.

Justin Bieber amazingly did not ruin Usher's performance of "OMG" with what appeared to be their overly-complex secret handshake, singing less than Mr. Raymond got to on the same number at the Super Bowl. Fortunately the tween idol didn't win anything, so we all owe a deep debt of gratitude to Esperanza Spalding for having awesome hair, an awesome voice, playing upright bass, and being able to do all three at once. Katy Perry held it down with a ballad before hit "Teenage Dream", and Norah Jones, Keith Urban, and John Mayer did a wonderful version of "Jolene". Eminem's much-hyped performance with Dr. Dre and Rihanna was augmented by backing vocals from Adam Levine of Maroon 5 and Skylar Grey (who you may remember as Holly Brook from "Where'd You Go", but apparently wrote "Love the Way You Lie" and is featured on "Coming Home"). The hip-hop party took a break for the escapees from the old-folks home to do their thing, then came back with a vengeance as Drake tried his best to leer at and hump Rihanna in convincing fashion for anti-Chris-Brown benefit.

Country outfit Lady Antebellum gathered a ton of awards for "Need You Now", an inexplicably romantic-sounding ode to booty calls that has been all over the airwaves. Song of the Year, Record of the Year, Country Song of the Year, Country Album of the Year... all I'm thinking is that we better watch out for a swell in the number of redneck children born 9 months from now.

All this, however, was merely a distraction from the fact that this was the year of the hipster at the Grammys, with Arcade Fire performing twice and taking home Album of the Year, performances by Mumford & Sons and The Avett Brothers with Bob Dylan, who could not have cared less how hip they were when the accordion failed to cut off at his gesture. The trio of Janelle Monae [show review here], B.O.B., and Bruno Mars ensured that the more urban-oriented American Apparel shoppers would enjoy it all too, as did Muse for the rockers, and Cee-Lo Green outdid Gaga at her own game. They've arrived, ladies and gentlemen. And judging by Danger Mouse's win for Producer of the Year, they aren't going anywhere, either.